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Monday 16 February 2015

Techno Guido Is Revealed

The recent addition of a persona calling himself Techno Guido to the obedient rabble of the perpetually thirsty Paul Staines at the Guido Fawkes blog was noted recently here on Zelo Street, as well as whoever was behind the alias not knowing one end of rail technology from the other. So who is the Fifth Man chez Fawkes? Fortunately, we need not wait any longer to find out, as he has outed himself.
Fart in lift Inquiry squeezes in new participant

To little surprise, the name in the frame is Jeremy Wilson, who came to my attention just over two years ago after he wrote a cut and paste hatchet job on this blog for the deeply unpleasant Milo Yiannopoulos at the Kernel Mag. This invoked The Curse Of Zelo, and so it came to pass that less than two months later, that very same Kernel Mag bid its dwindling audience adieu, as the debts mounted and Yiannopoulos floundered.
I do hope Wilson got paid for his article, however lame the content. At his new berth, he will have no problems on that front, as The Great Guido is in possession of, well, Loadsamoney, and wastes no time telling the world about it. And Jezza will have no problem fitting in with the right-leaning inhabitants of the Fawkes bunker, as one glance at his Twitter feed all too readily confirms.
In the run-up to Christmas, he whined “My train has been been cancelled because ‘there is no driver’. Tax subsidy sponging bastards”. What a tolerant and charming person. But then, he has done some work for Breitbart London, domain of James “saviour of Western civilisation” Delingpole, so perhaps some of Del Boy’s sneering’n’air quotes combo has rubbed off on him. Because knowledge of how The Railway functions clearly hasn’t.
He also appears to be another of those who is highly susceptible to the idea that, somehow, The Railway can substitute robots for drivers and all would be well. “Wouldn't it be terrible is [sic] they replaced train and tube drivers with robots. And trains didn't small like wee. And the air con worked” he carped. It is believed he travelled by First Great Western to Bristol. So he has some room for complaint.
However, and here we encounter a significantly sized however, new trains are on their way, and anyone up to speed with the technology would have known that. But the great revelation was at hand: “I've been hiding who I truly am for too long. It's finally time to come out” he told. Yes? Yes yes? Yes yes yes? “I am Techno Guido”. Well, colour me totally disinterested with some paint to watch dry.
What a crawler

And he was up to speed from the word go: “Nothing but positive feedback for the new Guido Fawkes website!” he chirped obediently. One hates to sound a discordant note, but, put it this way, I do hope nobody had to shell out any money for it. I also hope, for the sake of The Great Guido, that Wilson has not brought The Curse Of Zelo with him from the late and not at all lamented Kernel Mag.

After all, it’s always a pleasure to skewer the Fawkes rabble. Long may it continue.

1 comment:

Andreas Paterson said...

I love the whole "I am Iron Man.." vibe that he's trying put across, it's cute.